When I don’t meet your expectations.
It's exhausting trying to be what everyone else wants me to be, or expect me to be and sometimes can feel overwhelming.
To some, I’m the quiet one who doesn’t speak up, labeled as "too nice" to say anything. To others, I’m the rude one who talks back when necessary. And then there are those who see me as the brat who always gets her way, expecting me to demand what I want. As for me, I expect to be treated the same way I treat others, especially those close to me. So when I don't receive the same treatment or when my expectations aren't met, I often feel sadness and disappointment but don’t we all? However, as we grow older, we (hopefully) come to understand that not everyone thinks or behaves the same way we do and that is something I am still trying to understand.
These expectations from others weigh heavily on me, just as my own expectations weigh on them. Its exhausting, isnt it?
I hope for kindness, care, respect—often wishing to be treated as I treat them but don’t we all? It’s important however to remember, for both of us, that there's a difference between expectations and reality. Just because we expect something from others doesn't mean they'll act accordingly, and that's a hard truth to accept. When we place high expectations on others and they fail to meet them, it’s easy to feel disappointment, almost like saying, "Oh, you didn’t do what I wanted you to." But we have to remember, expectations are not guarantees, and reality doesn’t always align with what we hope for.
As I grow older, the responsibilities that come with age naturally increase. I’m now expected to be more responsible—managing my time, working, cleaning, cooking, taking care of both my physical and mental health, studying, and the list goes on. I’m expected to support those close to me, to be there when they need me, while also meeting my own expectations. But when so much is expected of you, it’s easy to lose sight of what you truly want. The lines blur, and you can start to feel unsure of what you should expect from yourself.
A little reminder for both of us—because I need to hear this too—when others don’t meet your expectations, don’t take it personally and same goes when you don’t meet their expectations of you. Holding on to that disappointment will only hurt you in the end. So, something I’ve always said, listen to yourself and note what you expect from yourself and not what others feed to you.
That’s all for today.
Nish xo
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